The Essence of Coaching

Sarah M was a dedicated leadeship coach. She had a deep understanding of the importance of emotional intelligence and social skills in building successful leaders. Sarah’s own journey to becoming a coach had been a transformational one. She had once struggled with self-confidence and self-awareness, but with the guidance of a compassionate mentor, she had blossomed into a confident and empathetic leader herself.

One day, Sarah received a call from a client named Alex, a talented but introverted manager in a fast-paced tech company. Alex had been facing challenges in his role, struggling to connect with his team and express his ideas effectively. He felt like an outsider in his own team meetings.

Sarah started working with Alex, helping him understand the power of emotional intelligence. She taught him to recognize his own emotions and those of his team members. Through self-coaching techniques, Alex learned to manage his anxiety and communicate more openly. Sarah encouraged him to practice active listening, empathy, and constructive feedback.

As weeks turned into months, Alex’s transformation was astounding. His colleagues noticed his newfound confidence and empathetic leadership style. He had become a trusted mentor and collaborator, and his team’s productivity soared. Alex was no longer an outsider but a respected and admired leader.

Sarah’s story is a testament to the profound impact of coaching and the importance of emotional intelligence and social skills in leadership. It illustrates how a dedicated coach can not only transform a career but also change a person’s life, fostering the growth of successful leaders who, in turn, inspire and uplift others.

Coaching has emerged as a powerful tool for personal and professional development in recent years. Whether you’re aiming to enhance your career, improve relationships, or simply grow as an individual, coaching can be a game-changer. In this blog, we’ll explore the significance of coaching and self-coaching, delving into how they can help you unleash your full potential.

The Essence of Coaching

Coaching is a collaborative and goal-oriented process that involves a trained coach working with a client to achieve specific objectives. Coaches provide guidance, support, and feedback to help individuals navigate challenges, set goals, and make meaningful progress. Here’s why coaching matters:

  1. Clarity and Focus: Coaches help you clarify your goals and priorities. They encourage you to dig deep and identify what truly matters to you, allowing you to focus your efforts on what’s most important.

  2. Accountability: Coaches hold you accountable for your actions and commitments. Knowing that someone is tracking your progress can be a powerful motivator, helping you stay on track toward your goals.

  3. Feedback and Perspective: Coaches provide honest and constructive feedback. They offer fresh perspectives, helping you see situations from different angles and find new solutions to challenges.

  4. Self-Discovery: Coaching often leads to self-discovery. It can uncover hidden strengths and weaknesses, enabling you to leverage your strengths and address areas for improvement.

The Importance of Emotional Intelligence and Social Skills

In the coaching process, two crucial elements come into play: emotional intelligence and social skills. These are essential for both coaches and clients:

  1. Emotional Intelligence (EQ): EQ involves recognizing and understanding your own emotions and those of others. Coaches with high EQ can empathize with their clients, creating a safe and supportive environment for growth. Clients with strong EQ can better manage their emotions, leading to improved relationships and decision-making.

  1. Social Skills: Effective communication, active listening, and the ability to build rapport are essential social skills in coaching. Coaches use these skills to establish trust and connect with their clients, while clients can enhance their relationships and leadership abilities by developing these skills.

The Power of Self-Coaching

While working with a coach is immensely beneficial, self-coaching is a skill everyone can develop. Here’s how to incorporate self-coaching into your life:

  1. Set Clear Goals: Define your objectives and desired outcomes. Break them down into manageable steps.

  2. Reflect Regularly: Take time to reflect on your progress. What’s working well? What needs adjustment? Be honest with yourself.

  3. Seek Feedback: Solicit feedback from trusted friends, colleagues, or mentors. They can offer valuable insights.

  4. Embrace Continuous Learning: Invest in your personal growth by reading, attending workshops, or exploring online resources.

  5. Practice Mindfulness: Mindfulness techniques can help you become more self-aware and manage stress effectively.

Coaching and self-coaching are powerful tools for personal and professional growth. They can help you overcome obstacles, discover your true potential, and become a more emotionally intelligent and socially adept individual. Whether you work with a coach or embark on a self-coaching journey, remember that the path to self-discovery and improvement is a lifelong journey, and the rewards are immeasurable. So, don’t hesitate to invest in yourself and start your coaching journey today.

Revamping Leadership

In the rapidly evolving world we live in today, it has become crucial for leaders to renovate their leadership styles to effectively meet the needs of the new generation. The young people of today are the future parents, teachers, managers, and politicians who will shape our society. To ensure a prosperous and harmonious future, it is imperative that leaders recognize and adapt to the unique needs of this generation. This blog explores the importance of embracing change, learning new abilities, and utilizing advanced technology to bridge the generation gap and foster meaningful progress.


Understanding the Needs of the New Generation

The new generation, often referred to as millennials and Gen Z, has grown up in a technologically advanced and interconnected world. They possess a different set of values, priorities, and expectations compared to previous generations. Recognizing these needs is essential for leaders seeking to engage and empower the younger workforce effectively.


Purpose and Meaning: Young people today seek a sense of purpose and meaning in their work. They desire to contribute to a greater cause, make a positive impact, and align their values with their career choices. Leaders must inspire and guide their teams by emphasizing the significance of their work and providing opportunities for personal growth and development.


Collaboration and Inclusivity: The new generation values collaboration and inclusivity. They thrive in environments that encourage teamwork, open communication, and diverse perspectives. Leaders should foster a culture of inclusivity, where every individual feels valued and empowered to contribute their unique insights and ideas.


Work-Life Balance: Achieving a healthy work-life balance is a priority for the new generation. They prioritize flexibility, well-being, and personal fulfillment. Leaders should adopt flexible work policies and support employees’ well-being to enhance productivity and job satisfaction.


Technology and Digital Fluency: Young people are digital natives, comfortable with using advanced technology in their personal and professional lives. Leaders must embrace technological advancements and equip themselves with digital literacy to effectively communicate, collaborate, and lead in the digital age.


Adapting to Change: Lessons from Past Industrial Revolutions

History has shown that resisting change and failing to adapt can lead to dire consequences for leaders. The past industrial revolutions serve as poignant examples of the importance of innovation and flexibility.


During the first industrial revolution, leaders who embraced mechanization and improved manufacturing processes thrived, while those who clung to outdated methods faced obsolescence. Similarly, the advent of the internet and the digital revolution forced businesses and leaders to adapt or risk being left behind.


In today’s fast-paced world, the fourth industrial revolution, characterized by advanced technologies like artificial intelligence, robotics, and automation, is reshaping industries at an unprecedented rate. Leaders who resist these changes risk hindering progress and alienating the new generation.


Embracing Change for Efficient Leadership

Adapting leadership styles to meet the needs of the new generation is not just a matter of necessity; it is also a path to greater efficiency and success. Here’s why:


  • Improved Employee Engagement: By addressing the unique needs and aspirations of the new generation, leaders can enhance employee engagement and foster a positive work environment. Engaged employees are more productive, innovative, and committed to their organization’s goals.
  • Enhanced Innovation and Creativity: Embracing diverse perspectives and fostering a culture of collaboration stimulates innovation and creativity within teams. Leaders who encourage new ideas and experimentation empower their employees to think outside the box, leading to breakthroughs and competitive advantages.
  • Attracting and Retaining Top Talent: The new generation seeks workplaces that offer purpose, growth opportunities, and a positive work culture. Leaders who embrace change and create an environment that aligns with these values attract and retain top talent, creating a competitive advantage for their organizations.
  • Harnessing Technology for Efficiency: Advanced technologies offer powerful tools for leaders to streamline processes, automate repetitive tasks, and gain valuable insights. Leaders who embrace technology can optimize operations, improve decision-making, and stay ahead in a rapidly evolving business landscape.


Renovating leadership styles to meet the needs of the new generation is vital for building a brighter future. By understanding and addressing the unique needs of young people, leaders can bridge the generation gap, foster collaboration, and drive meaningful progress.


Embracing change, learning new abilities, and utilizing advanced technology are not only necessary but also efficient strategies for success in today’s evolving world. Leaders who adapt and evolve with the times are better positioned to inspire their teams, attract top talent, and navigate the challenges and opportunities of the future.

Empowering Tomorrow’s Leaders: The Importance of Self-Coaching for Developing EQ and Soft Skills in Students

Academic prowess is not the sole factor that determines a person’s likelihood of future success in today’s fast-paced environment. Students need to put equal effort into developing their emotional intelligence, soft skills, and leadership traits if they want to have powerful personalities and be effective leaders in the future.

Students are encouraged to engage in self-improvement and self-reflection when they participate in self-coaching, which is one of the most efficient ways to accomplish this goal. In this blog post, we are going to talk about the significance of self-coaching in the context of the educational setting, as well as present real-life examples and tales that show how beneficial it can be.


Increasing One’s Capacity for Emotional Intelligence:

The ability to identify and control one’s own feelings and behaviors, as well as those of other people, is a key component of emotional intelligence. Students can improve their emotional intelligence through the use of self-coaching, which instructs them to understand their own feelings and teaches them how to properly manage those feelings.

For instance, in a study that was carried out by Marc Brackett and his fellow researchers at the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, an instrument known as a “mood meter” was presented to kids who were enrolled in middle school. Students were able to better recognize their own feelings and pinpoint the circumstances that gave rise to those feelings with the use of this tool. The pupils gained the ability to properly articulate their feelings and communicate their requirements through the utilization of the mood meter.

As a direct consequence of this, pupils’ levels of self-assurance in their ability to communicate improved, and the number of instances of bullying dropped by a sizeable amount.


Building Soft Skills:

Communication, problem-solving, working well with others, and managing one’s time effectively are a few examples of the “soft skills” that are essential for success in today’s workplace. Students are assisted in the development of these skills through the practice of self-coaching, which encourages students to evaluate their own capabilities, determine their areas of improvement, and establish plans to achieve their goals.

Students at George Brown College in Canada were given access to a self-coaching program as part of a study that was carried out by Dr. Sarah Leupen and her coworkers. The purpose of the study was to assist students in the development of their “soft skills.” The students were instructed to create precise goals for each ability that they desired to develop, and they were also trained to track their progress toward achieving those goals. They were provided with feedback from both their classmates and their mentors, which assisted them in determining areas in which they needed more development.

As a direct consequence of this, students saw improvements not only in their ability to communicate and collaborate effectively but also in their overall academic achievement.


Developing Qualities Necessary for Leadership:

In the modern world, the ability to demonstrate leadership is considered quite valuable. Students are helped to develop leadership traits through the practice of self-coaching, which encourages students to determine their leadership style, establish goals, and build tactics for becoming effective leaders.

For example, in a study helmed by Dr. Terri Watson and carried out at The College at Brockport, State University of New York, a leadership program was developed with the intention of assisting students in the process of self-coaching in order to improve their leadership abilities. The students were instructed to examine their own leadership styles, make a list of their advantages and disadvantages, and formulate a plan for how they may become better. They were also given comments on their leadership abilities by their peers and mentors, which assisted them in developing a better grasp of those abilities overall.

As a direct result of this, the students considerably enhanced their leadership qualities and gained greater self-assurance in their own talents to take charge.


Students’ emotional intelligence, soft skills, and leadership traits can be effectively developed through the use of self-coaching, which is an effective technique to improve these qualities. Students have the ability to develop the skills they need to be successful in all aspects of their lives if the educational system incorporates self-coaching into the learning environment. Schools and universities can give their students the tools they need to become successful self-coaches, develop strong personalities, and become leaders in their chosen industries if they provide them with the appropriate support, resources, and tools.



  • Brackett, M. A., Rivers, S. E., Reyes, M. R., & Salovey, P. (2012). Enhancing academic performance and social and emotional competence with the RULER feeling words curriculum. Learning and Individual Differences, 22(2), 218-224.

Leupen, S. M., Parnell, J. A., & Kroll, L. (2017). Self-coaching for soft skills development: Enhancing employability for business students. Journal of Education for Business.

Our Group

Navigating Job Loss: Tips for Emotional Support and Resources for Those Recently Laid Off

Losing a job can be a difficult and emotional experience. The feelings of uncertainty, stress, and anxiety that come with job loss can be overwhelming, and it can be hard to know where to turn for support. If you have recently been laid off, know that you are not alone. Many people go through this experience, and there are resources available to help you navigate this challenging time.

One of the most important things to do after being laid off is to take care of your emotional well-being. It can be easy to get caught up in the practical aspects of finding a new job, but it’s essential to prioritize your mental health during this time. Here are some tips for taking care of your emotional well-being after being laid off:

– Allow yourself to feel your emotions: It’s normal to feel a range of emotions after being laid off, including sadness, anger, and frustration. It’s essential to allow yourself to feel these emotions and to process them in a healthy way. This could mean talking to a trusted friend or family member, writing in a journal, or seeking professional counseling.

– Stay connected with others: Being laid off can be isolating, but it’s important to stay connected with others. This could mean reaching out to friends and family for support, attending networking events, or joining a support group for people who have recently been laid off.

– Take care of your physical health: Taking care of your physical health can help improve your mental health. This could mean exercising regularly, eating a healthy diet, getting enough sleep, and avoiding drugs and alcohol.

– Focus on the things you can control: After being laid off, it’s easy to feel like everything is out of your control. However, there are things you can control, such as your attitude, your job search strategy, and your personal development. Focusing on the things you can control can help you feel more empowered during this challenging time.

– Be kind to yourself: It’s important to be kind to yourself during this time. Avoid negative self-talk, and focus on your strengths and accomplishments. 

– Celebrate small wins along the way, such as sending out a great job application or receiving positive feedback from an interviewer. 

In addition to taking care of your emotional well-being, it’s essential to seek out resources and support during this time. Many employers offer outplacement services or job search resources to help employees who have been laid off. These services can include resume and cover letter assistance, job search coaching, and networking opportunities.

You can also reach out to community resources, such as local job search support groups or nonprofit organizations that offer career counseling and training. Online resources, such as job search websites and social media groups, can also be helpful in connecting you with job opportunities and support.

Remember that being laid off does not define you or your worth. It’s a difficult experience, but it can also be an opportunity for growth and change. By taking care of your emotional well-being and seeking out resources and support, you can navigate this challenging time and come out stronger on the other side.

Becoming A Storm Survivor

It is crucial to have goals and dreams, but the question is, what do we do when things get difficult? One of the most vitally crucial aspects of being human is being able to imagine what the future holds and maintain a sense of hope when things don’t go our way. It is important to train our minds to understand that having a poor day, failing an exam, breaking up with a significant other, or losing our job or our business does not mean that the future is hopeless.


When our aspirations and dreams have yet to come to fruition, it may be difficult to believe that wonderful things are going to come our way. This concept is especially true when we look at the past. If we can discover reasons to have hope for the future, we may maintain a positive outlook on life, even when things aren’t going the way we hoped they would. When difficult things occur, such as when mistakes are made, we make use of our self-awareness and optimism to refocus our attention on the solutions, which are the positive elements of the situation.


We are all familiar with the proverb “every dark cloud has a silver lining,” yet we frequently fail to recognize the potential that this concept could bring into our lives if it were applied to every challenging circumstance. 


The idea that every cloud has a silver lining is more than just a cliche; it’s an approach that has a respectable amount of research to back it up. Psychologists frequently discuss the ability to unearth previously unknown advantages in challenging situations. This means that when a situation presents itself to us, our brain unconsciously goes to the negative aspects of it. However, as time passes and we begin thinking about it, we realize that the storm brought with it opportunities that we could only see after the dust had settled. Because of the emotional sabotage that is generated by our negative feelings, such as fear and panic in response to the storm, it is impossible for us to comprehend what we could possibly benefit from.


We can certainly become storm survivors and retrain our brains to view the future with optimism and hope, if we understand the fundamental skills of a positive attitude and put them into practice. As a result, we will have an easier time focusing the spotlight in low-light conditions.




Optimism, like any other mental habit, is not an intrinsic ability but rather a mental disposition that can be developed. Optimism is a mindset that we adopt in response to the challenges that life presents. We have two choices: either we allow ourselves to be defeated and succumb to hopelessness, or we can respond to the situation and discover that, in the end, there is always a reason to be happy or to learn something from the experience. At the very least, we can make an effort.


This ability is best understood by contrasting the attitudes of an optimist with their polar opposite, the pessimist. Pessimists see the glass as half empty, while optimists see it as half full. While optimists and pessimists alike argue about the situation, a third group appears and, ironically, swoops in and drinks what’s in the glass. This group is known as opportunists.


Optimism and pessimism are both mindsets that influence how we view the world and what’s happening around us. Optimists believe that success is the result of their own hard work and effort, while pessimists believe that success is the result of good fortune or fate. Optimists believe  that a difficulty, such as the loss of a job, will only last for a short period of time or that it is the result of a shortage of work in their sector. 


Optimists are positive, they reassure themselves that they will put in a lot of effort to locate another job, and that, as a result, another job will be secured. A pessimist, however, regards a job loss as someone else’s doing; for example, their boss has a poor opinion of them. They believe that the system is rigged against them and life isn’t fair to them. A pessimist will view the loss of employment as a significant obstacle when it occurs. They have the impression that they are a failure.


Optimism Is a State of Mind


Whoever is looking for reasons to be unhappy will have little trouble finding plenty of them. Research conducted over a period of over fifty years has consistently demonstrated that optimists enjoy longer lives that are both healthier and happier. Neuroscientists believe that a happy attitude increases the amount of the neurotransmitter dopamine that is produced in the brain. Dopamine is a crucial hormone that plays a role in how we feel happiness. Optimism is a mental state that is marked by hope and confidence in our ability to achieve our goals and have a favorable future. If we have the habit of always looking on the bright side of things, we can have the impression that we have more pleasant experiences in our lives than other people, that we are less stressed, and that we enjoy greater health benefits.


How do you know if you’re optimistic? In many situations, those around you have probably already given you some insight into your optimistic versus pessimistic tendencies.

Optimists tend to have a number of key characteristics in common, including the fact that they can easily point out good things in any given situation, that they often have a smile on their face, that they always hold out hope for a change in luck, and that they always put in a lot of effort to achieve their goals.


When we have negative feelings about ourselves, we unconsciously act in ways that end up validating our beliefs. For instance, if we have the thought that we are not deserving of a good relationship, a good job, or stable financial circumstances, we will either stop pursuing these goals at the level that is necessary to achieve them or sabotage ourselves along the way. When we are in a cycle of feeling bad about ourselves, we need to find a way to break out of it. One critical way may be to communicate more effectively, to be able to verbalize our needs specifically, and to communicate those needs more plainly and openly. With this skill, we will be forced to construct a life that is rational and grounded in reality in order to fulfill those needs and live an authentic life.


It is important to keep in mind that the key to creating motivation and optimism for yourself is to celebrate your successes and milestones. Have you formed the poor habit of thinking negatively whenever you are confronted with situations, or do you tend to look on the positive side of things? 


The figurative comparison of an optimist as someone who can look on the bright side of any circumstance and a pessimist as someone who can only see the negative aspects of any circumstance is made using the metaphor I mentioned previously, of a person who sees the glass either half full or half empty. Negativism can put a stop to forward movement, while optimism can motivate and promote it.


Optimism Framework


We can use this model to work through any situation in an upbeat and practical manner. The steps that are outlined below are a framework that can assist us in defining and working through the problem or situation. This model was originally developed by Dr. Martin Seligman, the founding father of positive psychology.

Adversity: Everything that we observe is a problem or an unfortunate circumstance. In this exercise, we will first imagine a hypothetically bad scenario from a pessimistic point of view, and then from an optimistic point of view.


Disputation: Engaging in a debate with ourselves, such as when we ask, “What’s the evidence for this belief?” In the face of adversity, what are some alternative perspectives to take? We ask questions like, “Even if my belief is correct, what are its implications, and how useful is holding on to the negative belief?”


Distancing: Implies ditching pessimism and distancing ourselves from the pessimistic explanations. We can separate ourselves from others’ baseless allegations, but we’re terrible at it for ourselves. For example, igniting daily self-accusations. These are usually negative behaviors or notions that we carry with us from the past.


Distracting: Helps us get away from the negative thoughts we’ve been having. We can force ourselves to quit by employing a mental or physical strategy. Some people keep an elastic band around their necks, and if they have a negative thought, they snap the band. We should do whatever it takes to get the energy flowing in the right direction so we can move on.


The Hungarian-American nuclear physicist Edward Teller said: “When you come to the end of all the light you know, and it’s time to step into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing that one of two things will happen: either you will be given something solid to stand on, or you will be taught to fly.”




The corporate well-being psychologist, Bhali Gill, said “many people aren’t aware of how powerful visualization can be in their lives”. In fact, many of us do plenty of visualization every day. The problem is that most of us are doing visualizations to create the lives we don’t want. We often use it to imagine the worst outcomes or worry about a future that is out of our immediate control.

Imagine that everything goes according to plan and the future is as bright and beautiful as it possibly can be. It could be helpful to imagine a specific moment in the distant future, such as five years from now. This could also be considered goal setting, and your job is to make these goals achievable through positive thoughts and actions. Do not sit and watch opportunities pass you by.


If this future unfolds as planned, you will have accomplished every objective that you set for yourself. You have found the person you are meant to be with. You have made your mark in the professional world as well as accomplished many of your financial objectives. You may be in the best shape of your life. You have reliable and kind friends. The goals are endless. Imagine the future in as much specific detail as you possibly can, both in terms of what it will look like and what it will mean to you. 


Concentrate your attention on a single facet of your life that continues to provide you with such contentment and fulfillment. Either put your ideas and emotions down on paper so that you can see them in front of you, or envision them in your head and talk out loud about how you feel about them. You may also imagine that future and live with the specifics that are depicted in that image rather than writing anything down or speaking aloud. 


You can perform this exercise while sitting, standing, or even lying down, as long as there are no distractions around. Train your brain to imagine what being successful looks like in great detail, and over time, your brain will start to believe that this is the truth, and it will begin to deploy all of the resources that are necessary to stay within this reality. As a consequence of this, each of your senses, in addition to your thinking, will collaborate in order to achieve that state of mind. It is then that you will see your goals, dreams, and aspirations come true 

Bending and Flexing With Changes

Boost Adaptability


George Bernard Shaw said the reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in adapting the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on man’s unreasonableness.


The ability to adapt is not innate but rather a learned intellectual habit. Being able to quickly learn new abilities and behaviors in reaction to shifting circumstances is a critical component of this type of leadership competency, which requires both emotional and social intelligence. These days, the normal stresses that life brings are compounded by extraneous stresses from the outside world, which add so many unknowns and make us feel like we have so little control over them.


Why is adaptability so important? Being able to respond to shifting trends in change, innovation, destabilization, and movements in industry, among other things, is an essential micro-skill of adaptability. For instance, even though there is a lot of attention being paid to how Artificial Intelligence is affecting automation, its usage has already expanded outside the manufacturing business. As a result, those who are employed need to advance along with this invention as well as the one that comes after it, but the shifts in technology are only part of the picture. When a company’s business model is no longer successful and the revenue is falling, the employees who are able to adapt by reducing costs, thinking differently, and most importantly, looking into the future and seeing the way forward are the ones who will carry the company forward through these difficult times and see it through to success. On the other hand, employees who claim a particular standard of conducting business are ultimately responsible for the company’s decline.


Becoming more adaptable: During phases of change, our methods of thinking need to be revised, and we need to let go of the idea that “this is how we’ve always done it.” Accepting change and viewing it as a chance to grow, learn, and improve is a healthy response to the fact that change can be frightening and overwhelming. Additionally, it may facilitate the development of creative potential. On the other hand, this necessitates being receptive to the viewpoints and ideas of other people.


It is impossible to make progress without taking some risks, although the whole concept of risk can make some individuals feel so uncomfortable that they want to run as far away from it as possible. Leaders that are flexible bring out potential risks during team meetings and lay the groundwork for support. Because of this way of thinking, those leaders are able to keep an open mind and foster an environment of honesty in the workplace. This urges others to do the same, creating a more open atmosphere around them, and hopefully, shutting down closed mindsets, which may compromise the whole transformation process.


Flexible Way of Thinking


Splitting change scenarios into smaller groups is a powerful strategy to explore the situation better and understand the combination of the variety of angles that created that situation. Here are some ideas to approach change with an open mind and think of them as an opportunity to improve the system and relationships:


  • First, be clear about what change is about to happen. And remember, different people may have different views of what that situation is.
  • Second, Put aside your disagreements for the time being and actively listen to others with the goal of coming to the realization that there is likely a great deal of potential for innovation if you are able to do so.
  • Third, In order to come up with possible solutions to the change, encourage everyone involved to participate in a brainstorming session, write down all of their ideas, and then compile a list of the available possibilities.


Analytical thinking is similar to when you leave your computer on and all of your programs continue to operate for days without restarting or shutting down the computer. It will eventually start acting jerkily and working more slowly, at which point you will have to either turn it off or restart it. The same is true for our brains; our bodies were made to react to brief bouts of stress; however, when stress lasts for an extended period of time, and the stress response is triggered repeatedly and regularly – as it can occur in stressful jobs or relationships – the situation transforms into one of chronic stress, and we run the risk of experiencing burnout. Burnout is the typical outcome when we engage the brain in continuing and rigid processes.


We should give ourselves permission to take a step back from rigid processes and analytical thinking. We should also take a step back from stressful situations and give our minds permission to return to their center. To relax our brain and tune into our body. We can use mindfulness or any other technique, like the breath technique or the body scan technique, or physical exercises.


There are two different types of emotional intelligence, both of which are important when it comes to maintaining a healthy balance. The first type, known as intrapersonal intelligence, refers to our capacity to control our own thoughts and feelings. Through this ability, we determine whether or not to have a positive or negative reaction to each new experience that arises in our lives. The second type of intelligence is called interpersonal intelligence, and it enables us to constructively handle the feelings of other people.


Here are some pointers to help you comprehend the feelings of others and cope with them: 


  • Take careful note of their actions in the present, such as the way they use their hands, the tone of their voice, and whether or not their face is growing flushed.
  •  Pay attention to signs such as these so that you may manage the dynamics of the conversation before it goes in unwelcome directions. 
  • Make introspective statements and offer open-ended follow-up questions, such as “I see that you’re unhappy. What’s going on?” They will start telling you their narrative as a result of this. If you ask them questions and encourage them to open up about how they feel about the situation, their brain will receive powerful signals that you are trying to understand how they are feeling.


Leadership Curiosity


Listening carefully and trying to comprehend what others are saying is essential to becoming a flexible leader and being able to affect positive change. It is critical to obtain the facts from all parties involved, and you should never base significant judgments on only one side of a story, regardless of who is providing that side (it could be you). Although it may appear to be self-evident, you’d be surprised at the number of people who don’t do this. There are always two sides to a story. It is essential to people’s ability to communicate with you that you make them feel welcome and at ease to do so. This is something that takes place when you engage in active listening with the intention of comprehending the circumstance from a variety of perspectives prior to elaborating on how your perspective pertains to the circumstance.


When was the last time you made a judgment about someone without first discussing it in an open and honest manner with that person? Have you inquired as to their viewpoint and been open to listening, truly listening in order to comprehend, as opposed to only listening, in order to respond and talk? Agile leaders have an open mindset, are patient, and listen carefully to what others have to offer. In point of fact, if you listen to other people, including those with whom you disagree, you open yourself up to fresh ideas and experiences that broaden your perspective. Having the ability to think creatively and come up with novel solutions can be of great value during times of upheaval. There are some skills that you can develop and tools that you can learn about that will get you ahead of the game.


Having a growth mindset is one of these abilities, and it’s vital to building adaptability, which is a leadership competency in emotional intelligence. Another one of these skills is being able to communicate effectively. There are primarily two ways of thinking about navigating life, growth and fixed mindsets; It is vital for one’s success to adopt a growth attitude. The concept of growth intelligence implies that we can get wiser and make better decisions as a result of amassing experiences and refining our behavior. Specifically, it is the notion that intellect can be developed. Because it is founded on self-limiting beliefs and restricted ways of thinking, having a fixed mindset can prevent us from achieving our goals.


Research on brain plasticity has demonstrated that the connectivity between neurons can alter as a result of experience. With practice, neural networks form new connections, strengthen existing connections, and insulate themselves to increase the speed at which impulses can be sent. These discoveries in neuroscientific research have taught us that the actions we perform, such as employing effective methods, inquiring about topics of interest, practicing, and adhering to healthy eating and sleeping patterns, can affect and accelerate the growth of our brain networks.

Deep Self-Diving (Catching up with ourselves)

Self-diving is a cognitive ability that empowers us to adequately comprehend our strengths, shortcomings, and controlling qualities just as others perceive them. Self-diving is the most significant way for us to access our capacity to control our outcomes. Self-diving is similar to self-awareness, which incorporates our capacity to perceive what’s going on within us and peruse the sensations inside our body. In simple terms, it is our capability to perceive our emotions and deal with their driving forces as well as our response to them.


Let’s imagine for a moment . . . Melanie is a physician who is doing rounds on the patients in the intensive care unit (ICU), but on her way there, she gets an unpleasant text message that makes her upset. Melanie is fully aware that she can’t afford to make any mistakes in her patients’ care or fail to recognize important changes in their status. She is faced with the decision of whether or not to acknowledge that the text message is disturbing her before entering the first patient’s room, or whether or not to put her anger to one side and continue with her rounding.


Self-diving means that Melanie should be aware of what she is experiencing on the inside of her, give it a name (for example, “I am unhappy about the text message”), watch and regulate her reaction to that feeling, and take into consideration how it may affect the others in her immediate environment. In the event that this does not occur, there is a significant likelihood that Melanie will carry her negative feelings with her and project them either onto the other practitioners who will be rounding with her or even onto the patients whom she plans to visit.


Melanie was fortunate in that she possessed a high level of emotional self-awareness, because she was aware that in order for her to be successful as a healthcare provider, she needed to be caring; and that she would not be able to have therapeutic relationships and assist others unless she had a firm grasp on her own identity. After the traumatic experience that caused her distress, she began engaging in self-diving with the intention of reading her inner world so that she could comprehend, exercise control over, and have an effect on her outer world (patients and their families, other practitioners).


The insight and understanding she gained regarding what was occurring on the inside of her enabled her to deliberately look at herself in an objective manner and witness the process of the information that was generated by the ignition of her negative emotions. As a consequence of this effort, she was able to effectively control her response to such feelings.


Melanie did not have it easy when it came to getting to know herself, (which is not an easy task for anyone). The importance of deep self-diving lies not only in the fact that it facilitates our understanding of ourselves, but also in the fact that it is a continual process of discovery, analogous to a game that features a variety of different challenge levels. After completing one level with success, you are advanced to the next one, which is much more difficult and is resistant to whatever adjustments you made in the level before it.


Drop by drop, the water pot is filled: Swimming ability and general physical fitness are prerequisites for becoming a scuba diver. The same is true for our brain: it takes practice for our brain to generate and deploy new neurons as well as build a communication system to send new signals through the process of neurogenesis. Developing new mental routines does not happen quickly, and there is no quick fix for this challenge. The good news is that we are able to regularly and gradually stimulate our brains with micro-tasks, and we are also able to coerce our brains into using what they have learned and storing it permanently as a footprint for other skills to build upon.


The question that has to be answered is how to complete the entire process successfully. The best way to assimilate difficult concepts is to break them down into manageable, step-by-step processes that are both structured and actionable. This process will allow for a smooth implementation even while we deal with the difficulties of everyday life.


Strengths and Weaknesses


It’s vital to pay attention and identify the impact that our ideas and feelings have on how we act; for instance, if we’re pleased, we’re more likely to do good things, whereas if we’re furious, we’re more likely to do unkind things. The same principle applies to being conscious of both our strengths and our weaknesses.

Having an awareness of both our capabilities and limitations provides us with a deeper insight into who we are and how we function. There are a lot of people who find it hard to talk about their strengths and weaknesses, or simply to recognize what they are. But identifying them is incredibly important during crucial moments like when looking for a new career or when intending to run a business.


When we are aware of our weaknesses, we have a better idea of the factors that may be preventing us from achieving our goals. In addition, having this awareness can help us zero in on specific areas in which we may concentrate our efforts to enhance the overall quality of our life.


One good example of weaknesses, is when we frequently find ourselves overwhelmed simply because we find it difficult to say no to people. This can be at work, at home, or even to ourselves. When we become aware of this frequent flaw, we will be able to make major strides toward improving the quality of our life. We should put the question to ourselves: “What feelings are we aware of having right now?” Label them, give a description of each one, and then choose the one that stands out the most to us. When we get that emotion, what physical changes do we notice in our bodies? What if we suddenly felt the complete opposite of that emotion? What do we think would happen to our physical self? For the purpose of developing a high level of emotional self-awareness and preventing emotional hijacking, it is highly necessary to gain an understanding of what causes our feelings.


It is very obvious that we should not define our strengths with the purpose of comparing ourselves to others in order to determine who is more or less capable. People are different from one another, and this plays a significant role in how each individual identifies their own strengths. Instead, being aware of our own capabilities can enable us to build on those aspects and push ourselves further. When we feel confident about ourselves, we are able to tap into our full potential and do anything that provides us with a sense of accomplishment and enjoyment. Strengths are the things that usually come naturally to us and make us feel good about ourselves.


Unfortunately, a great number of people have either forgotten about their abilities or, as I indicated earlier, are simply unaware that they even exist. Those are individuals who pass up enormous opportunities to make substantial improvements. As a general rule, they are the ones who get a great deal out of complaining about their current predicament while doing nothing to improve it.

The strengths inventory may help us save a significant amount of time due to the fact that we already possess them. All that is required of us is to put those strengths to work. This will lead to increased self-confidence as well as an attitude that is more open to change.


Keep an Open Mind


Dr. Dan Siegel, in his attunement approach, said that attunement is where we sense a clear image of our mind in the mind of another. This is also known as empathy. Attunement is emotional mirroring, the ability to connect with others. And its polar opposite, emotional detachment, hinders our capacity to express our feelings, which can cause difficulty in developing and sustaining relationships.


Because our brains contain mirror cells, our actions are able to accurately reflect our feelings. Because of this, many of us are capable of shedding tears while hearing a tragic narrative because we can empathize with how others are feeling. However, emotional mirroring is an unconscious tendency, and it may have detrimental repercussions if the person we are emotionally mirroring is struggling with the same issue we are. We run the risk of getting buried in repeating our complaints about it over and over in a manner that prevents us from resolving the issue and moving on. Because we continue to share our worries and gloomy feelings with one another, the difficulty of the situation keeps growing.


This behavior happens rather frequently in teams, and it often reflects the closed attitude of the team’s leader, because the rest of the team only views the problem from the perspective of the leader, and they do not take the initiative to think creatively or even to communicate their own personal opinions. This results in a prolonged state of stagnation, which not only has an adverse effect on the performance of that team but also puts the accomplishments of the entire organization at risk.


According to a number of studies, it is impossible for corporate leaders to be successful if they do not have a genuine interest in the people around them and an openness to their perspectives and ideas. This is the only way to get leaders to diverge from their usual modes of thinking and come up with new ideas. Embracing an open mind not only allows them to gain a fresh perspective on a situation, but it also fosters a sense of collective ownership and responsibility amongst the team.


An open mind isn’t just for receiving other people’s views; it’s also for expressing our own. There is a psychological foundation to the art of being understood. The majority of people are unable to effectively communicate their ideas to others. The key is to be able to mentally reverse-engineer and cultivate sensations that are already familiar within one’s own head and imagination. Making our case, or at least letting others listen to something that they can identify with, will result in people loving us for who we are and making sense of our actions.


Stay Focused


Let me ask you a couple of questions: How many hours do you spend procrastinating by surfing the Internet before you finally get around to doing what has to be done? How often were you eating a meal while also watching the news or browsing through your Facebook feed? How quickly are you able to finish your meal? Do you have any recollection of the flavor or the specifics of that meal?

When it comes to wasting time on distractions or on the consumption of information, you should know that you are not alone in this. 


It should come as no surprise that we like using social networking sites like LinkedIn, Twitter, and Facebook for both personal and business purposes. But how can we maintain our involvement without letting them dictate the course of our lives and throwing off our schedule and priorities? Think about employing micro-techniques like the body scan technique. It is a good exercise to train your mind to focus on what you are doing and to prevent it from wandering and looking for distractions.


According to a study published in Harvard Business Review, there are various sorts of focus. Neuroscientists have recently discovered that we focus in a variety of ways, for a variety of goals, drawing on a variety of cerebral pathways—some of which function in harmony, while others tend to stand in opposition. Empathy, for example (which we will cover in more detail later), is viewed as a way of paying attention to the needs of others.


The term focus is used in this article to describe the attention leaders should pay to themselves by tuning in to their body and returning to their center of gravity. We can do this by paying close attention to our internal psychological signals, such as our gut feelings and our inner voice. The insula, which lies behind the frontal lobes in our brain, is responsible for monitoring these minute inputs. The insula’s sensitivity to any region of the body is heightened by the attention it receives. It increases the number of neurons in that circuitry when we tune in to our heartbeat, for example.


Putting our attention where we want it and keeping it there in the face of temptation to wander has a scientific term, self-regulation (a resilience micro-skill, which is a topic discussed in the next section). This attention is one component of the executive function of the brain, which is located in the prefrontal cortex. The prefrontal cortex is also where our willpower is housed.


Self-regulation provides us with the ability to persist in the pursuit of a goal despite interruptions and obstacles. The cerebral architecture that allows for such laser-like focus on our objectives is also responsible for keeping our emotions under control. People who are able to maintain their composure in the face of adversity, calm their own agitation, and bounce back after a setback or loss have strong self-regulation.


In his extraordinary book Focus, Dr. Daniel Goleman argues that in today’s world, we are constantly bombarded with information and stimuli. We have an urge to check our email or phone in case of new messages. When we do give in to the urge, it feels unsatisfying when there is nothing waiting for us. The constant distraction leads us to a state of continuous partial attention where we leap from one thing to another without fully engaging ourselves in any task at hand.

However, we can focus despite being surrounded by noise and distractions. What’s needed is the ability to selectively pay attention to what you want while ignoring other things. For example, journalists at The New York Times are able to complete their work even in an open-plan office full of noise and distractions. They never demand quiet because they have a strong ability to select what they pay attention to.


Not everyone has good selective attention, which refers to the processes that allow them to choose and focus on certain input for further processing while blocking out irrelevant or distracting information. They can’t ignore distractions and focus on the task at hand, which reduces their productivity. In addition, it’s hard to immerse yourself in a subject when you’re constantly distracted by other things and your ability to learn new things is reduced. This issue is so prevalent that internet addiction among young people has been identified as a national health problem in many Asian countries. Therefore, if we can ignore distractions and focus well, we’ll be able to perform better.


Identify Triggers


David, a disciplined and successful salesperson working for an educational company, had an unpleasant fight with his partner one evening. He was irritated about it, but his self-talk was narrating the scenarios of a sales meeting he was going to have the day after. David’s mind was more focused on his professional priorities, and he was thinking that the fight would distract him from planning the various sales strategies he was going to use in the possible scenarios of the client’s resistance. 


Therefore, David made the decision to ignore his emotions because he wanted to concentrate on the meeting scheduled for the following day. This indicates that David was unconsciously repressing and avoiding recognizing how he was feeling as a result of the argument he had with his partner.


This may have provided a temporary solution to the problem at hand, but David did not know that the repressed sentiments may eventually manifest themselves in a variety of psychological and/or physical symptoms. His best move should’ve been bending and flexing with his emotions and not ignoring the agony they created. Suppressing his emotions was not going to make them disappear; rather, they would remain inside of him and cause him even more suffering.


Our brain learns to determine what causes our pleasant or bad emotions only if we train it to recognize, acknowledge, and accept our feelings as they occur without criticizing them or attempting to avoid them. This level of mastery would prevent the brain from acting as if we are battling an enemy and, therefore, from sending messages to the body to expend energy and release the stress hormone cortisol.


According to research, when our emotions are triggered, we experience two types of reactions. The first is a psychological reaction, such as sweaty palms or a racing heartbeat; this reaction is regulated by the sympathetic nervous system. The second reaction is a behavioral reaction, which can be defined as the decision to act in a certain way based on how we interpret our feelings. When we are confronted with a scenario that has caused us to feel a certain way, it is up to us to decide how we will react to it.

Whether or Not You Believe in Affective Computing

For the avoidance of doubt, let me state unequivocally that I am of the opinion that there is no such thing as an emotional machine, nor do I believe that there ever will be in the near or far future, and the reason for this is that human biology cannot be replicated either by humans or machines.


The opinions expressed throughout this article are objective, yet it is quite likely that they can be argued over. This is due to the fact that everyone’s beliefs are founded on their own personal experiences, knowledge, and the way they interpret feelings. Nevertheless, because it is an existential matter for me, like the vast majority of other humans in today’s world, this subject is the only one in which I openly acknowledge having a bias. However, this does not mean that we are unable to openly define it, talk about it, or debate it because it is a hot topic that is rising in popularity within communities that think of it from different perspectives.

In saying this, I am advocating the power of the machine to read empirical data around human behavior and provide humans with a deep analysis of patterns. However, it must be made abundantly clear that the machine works on data from the past, algorithms, and probabilities, which makes it subject to a final human judgment.


The purpose of artificial intelligence emotion is to successfully change the traditional mechanical computer in order to improve human–computer interaction with regard to the accuracy of information processing. For instance, when we do a sentiment analysis to detect threats in a school environment, the machine learning examines the entire communication system, online search, and video browsing that is done on a daily basis by students and looks for potential flags, such as bullying or suicidal thoughts. In this way, schools identify potential dangers before they become actual ones.


This information is then transferred to a data lake, which is a repository for past instances that are waiting to be matched up. When those algorithms are executed, the machine recognizes circumstances that have occurred in the past and assigns a label to the red flag based on how the historical data is categorized. The positive aspect of this is that the machine will get more accurate in the future if more data is supplied in the present. In other words, AI doesn’t just store data so it can deliver it to users at a later time; it also learns and makes inferences.


This is additionally shown in the most current advancements in safety technology within the car sector. When the vehicle determines that the person behind the wheel is unable to maintain concentration, it will automatically make corrections to the steering and give the driver audible and visual warnings. When danger is detected, it has the ability to decide to slow down or even stop the vehicle altogether.


In addition to improving safety, emotional intelligence in technology now has the potential to improve our natural emotional intelligence as well as our capacity to navigate conversations with empathy. This is especially important in situations when employees who deal directly with customers become exhausted or distracted and lose their edge as a result of the strain of long days spent actively listening to and responding thoughtfully to the needs of consumers.


The constant and repetitive need for compassion can be taxing, leading to mental overload, emotional tiredness, and eventually burnout in those who are subjected to it. Emotional intelligence technology analyzes and interprets behavior in order to provide real-time guidance, which lets frontline staff bear less of the load of responsibility. In addition to this, it gives managers and executives access to performance data as well as insights about customers, allowing them to better assist staff training, performance improvement, and targeted guidance for their development.


According to an article written by Barry Libert and Megan Beck and published in Harvard Business Review, understanding, motivating, and interacting with other humans, as well as persuasion and empathy, are some of the areas in which humans still hold a significant advantage over their robot counterparts. The key for humans to continue to play a relevant role in professional industries is for individuals to embrace their one-of-a-kind human skills rather than turn away from the capabilities offered by AI.


By combining the better ability of machine learning to acquire data and implement outcomes with the emotional intelligence of humans, it is possible to achieve a symbiotic connection that improves both the quality and the efficiency of the results.

There is no way to dispute the fact that advances in technology have had an effect on leadership in the modern world, because our lives are either directly or indirectly impacted by technological advancements. In a similar vein, it has a significant influence on the leadership abilities of individuals. Nevertheless, executives need to have a deep understanding of relevant technology and ensure that they remain current. The younger generation represents the world’s potential for continued existence, and because of this, they need to begin receiving instruction at a young age to build their leadership qualities. The efficient application of technology has made it much simpler to accomplish more in a given amount of time.

Technology has increased productivity by helping people better organize their work and their time. It has eradicated all obstacles, including time, geography, and language constraints. It is now entirely up to us to ensure that the ever-advancing technology of the modern world is kept abreast of at all costs.

Transitioning to the New Year: How to Set Realistic Goals

Having a great number of hopes and ambitions is a key motivation to push yourself out of bed in the morning whether or not you are actually inspired to carry out your responsibilities and realize your daily goals. You need to have a strong plan in place in order to achieve what it is in life that you want. Setting realistic goals and making detailed plans allows you to see both the big picture and the day-to-day incremental progress that ultimately leads to achievement. If you watched the movie “The Bucket List”, which came out in 2007, starring Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman, you will have some idea of what is being said. The two major protagonists of this movie ended up meeting each other in a hospital. As the narrative progresses, one individual lends a hand to another in order to complete the activities on their bucket list. We should therefore make it a priority to offer one another assistance in compiling our bucket lists and initiating the activities listed within. Finding out what is important to us, what things get us involved, what our beliefs are and what things we want to alter in order to achieve our objectives is part of the process of defining goals for ourselves and working out how to attain those goals.

Goal setting implies that if we are not happy with the direction that our lives are taking, we need to make some changes in order to feel more fulfilled. If we are serious about making significant improvements in our lives, we will, without a doubt, have to alter our outcomes as well as the people we keep company with. If we take a look at the world around us and consider the individuals in our lives who are succeeding at the things they desire out of life, we may notice that these people have already made the necessary adjustments. Those who complain about the unfairness of life, how they never get a break, or how someone else has all the good fortune, are the ones in this entitled category of people. Unfortunately, they may not be looking at how hard those people have worked to create what they have. Setting realistic goals in life requires breaking them down into smaller and more manageable objectives. Asides the mnemonic acronym SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Time Bound) which is given as a guide to setting goals, here are other step by step guide we have put together for you to set realistic goals.

  1. Visualize and Journal your goals: Everything starts from your thoughts and the big picture you see yourself feature in. The very first step to setting realistic goals is to envision one. According to studies, setting a goal in writing and coming up with a detailed strategy with scheduled dates for accomplishment will greatly increase your chances of success. The more specific your plan is in writing, the more likely it is that you will carry it through and accomplish your challenging objectives. Journaling helps to make the goals stick well and helps set your priorities right.
  2. Have an Accountability Partner: Having a reliable person who holds you accountable can greatly boost your chances of achieving your set goals. The ideal accountability partner will encourage you when you lose sight of your objective, assist you in overcoming obstacles and applaud you when you make progress in that direction. The presence of an accountability partner is a committed partnership that encourages both parties to succeed.
  3. Frequently Track your progress: After envisioning your goals and putting them into writing, it is important to track your progress. When you track your progress, you identify the obstacles preventing you from achieving your desired result, you are able to redirect your efforts, ensure the effective use of your time and the available resources and remain motivated to stay on track.
  4. Overcome Limiting Beliefs: Louise Hay said “if you accept a limiting belief then, it will become true for you”. False beliefs also known as limiting beliefs discourage us from acting on crucial tasks or stepping beyond our comfort zones. They prevent you from pursuing your ambitions and goals. By recognizing your limiting beliefs, you can begin to modify your reality and stick to empowering thoughts. What do you want to achieve before this year runs out? Do you believe you have all it takes to get there? Do you believe in yourself or do you actually stand in the way of achieving your goals? According to Jason Pockrandt “Anything is possible once you believe you are worthy of achieving it.”
  5. Do not be afraid to ask for support: Whether or not you admit to this, we all need help at one point or the other in our lives. However, knowing what kind of help you require, when to ask for it and who to ask for it from are all crucial. You will receive the assistance you require when you require it if you keep this in mind. Some of the risks of trying to do everything yourself includes burnout, isolation and demotivation while asking for help can help you stay energized, keep your motivation alive and help you stay happy.

It takes a lot of determination and desire to get what we want out of life.  In  order  to  achieve  what  we  desire,  we  need  to  make  a commitment to ourselves and have an awareness of how things operate. Setting objectives, committing them to paper, and then actively pursuing them are ways to figure out which activities will get us to the final destination we see for ourselves. 

Are you stuck in your goal setting and will need a coach to get unstuck? Are you interested in cultivating the habit of Journaling? Are you interested in planning a smooth transition to the new year? Speak to an Expert for free here 

Pioneers of the 21st Century: New generations Leading with Empathy

There are so many changes in the 21st century workplace which will continue to occur even as the world evolves. While these changes occur, the leadership skills needed to thrive in this digital age remain unchanged. One might say the concepts stay the same, although the applications have changed. Of all the important unique skills and qualities that every 21st century leader must possess, the capacity to show empathy is a characteristic that is frequently disregarded and undervalued. The current condition of the workplace is really exhausting, disheartening, and unpleasant for many employees and as a leader, they look up to you to understand them, put yourself in their shoes, foster a healthy environment, motivate and inspire them. As Zig Ziglar said, you do not build businesses; you build people, and people build businesses. 

You do not build businesses; you build people and people build businesses

-Zig Ziglar 

Have you ever found yourself crying after hearing about a friend’s terrible situation? Or felt giddy with joy upon learning that someone you cared about had something wonderful happen to them? That quality is referred to as empathy. Empathy is the ability to understand the thoughts, feelings, and perspectives of other people, as well as the ability to use that understanding to direct our actions and assist those people. To be an empathetic leader, you need to go beyond just pretending to listen but actually listening and aiming to understand things from their perspective with a willingness to help. It is very important to understand that sympathy is not empathy. When you are sympathetic, you feel sorry for others and keep a healthy emotional, mental and physical distance from their thoughts or experiences. Whereas, empathy is more of the ability to deeply comprehend, relate to, or picture the circumstances or emotional state of another person. In essence, in contrast to feeling sorry for someone, you are actually feeling with them.

What about you personally? Do you treat yourself with the same consideration and kindness that you would give to a close friend? When you are going through a difficult time or when you become aware of something about yourself that you don’t like, do you give yourself comfort and care? We use compassion for ourselves as a means of relating to ourselves, warmly accepting ourselves in the present moment as we are. The question now is, how can we develop both self- compassion and empathy? According to human brain plasticity research, we have the ability to train our brains in the same way that we train our bodies. When we transform our minds, we improve not only our own well-being but also that of those who are in our immediate environment.

Most people believe that empathy is a weakness or a trait people are born with. It should however, be noted that empathy is not a display of weakness nor a show of strength, but being conscious of our everyday behaviour and how it influences those around us. This is why everyone, not only the C-suite, lower levels or selected individuals should be required to participate in leadership mentorship, coaching, and training to develop these skills. As an organization, now is the time to invest in this training and coaching program to teach your leaders empathy. Below are 3 powerful tips on how to be an empathetic Leader.

  1. Don’t just listen, truly listen: Empathetic leaders do not just listen but listen without interrupting to understand another person’s perspective. It is important not to interrupt other people and to make it a habit to let them finish what they are saying. It is also important to respect the fact that other people have thoughts that they are processing and talking about, and to wait to ask questions or make comments until after they have completed what they are saying. It is equally as important to listen to other people as it is to show them that you are listening to them. One way to do this is to summarize and paraphrase what was said to us in order to show that we heard. Listening actively demonstrates that you are interested in the conversation and you desire to hear everything the other person has to say to the extent that the speaker does not feel rushed and you do not appear to be in a hurry.
  2. Be mindful of your body language: When you engage in conversations with other people, you are constantly sending and receiving nonverbal cues from one another. It’s possible that empathy can be conveyed not only through words but also through our bodies, particularly our faces, which do the majority of the talking for us when we are having conversations with other people. When we communicate with other people, it is essential that we pay attention to what our bodies are expressing and check to see if it is consistent with what we are saying. According to some studies, we are even able to determine a person’s level of intelligence simply by observing their facial expressions and features. If we want other people to contribute their ideas to our project, we should not be multitasking at the same time as they are speaking! We should not give in to the temptation of checking our phones or looking around to see how the other participants are responding. Instead, we should direct our attention to the people who are currently expressing themselves by turning our heads and torsos to face them directly and making direct eye contact with them. Leaning forward is another nonverbal indicator that we are engaged in the conversation and paying attention to it. 
  3. Be open to others and accept that not everyone is like you: Leaders who have a high level of empathy demonstrate strong abilities to be open to others and accept that others are different with strengths and limitations, just like any other human being. Leaders also accept that they themselves have weaknesses that they cannot always rely on. If we have a hard time accepting other people’s flaws, we need to examine why a certain behaviour bothers us, and whether or not it is actually problematic or we are just projecting our own anxieties onto it. For instance, we often have very high standards for what we expect from other people. However, if we adjust our expectations to be more in line with reality, we can actually improve the overall quality of our lives as well as our level of career satisfaction.

Some Leaders are more empathetic in nature than others however with the right training and coaching, they will grow to improve their empathy skills. If you are able to demonstrate empathy as a leader, your team will feel safe around you and be open to share ideas which can boost their performance.